Ask a family member or a friend, “what is an elopement?” and a lot of people will tell you that it’s a scandalous, rushed, last minute marriage – they might tell you some variation of a couple who runs off to Vegas to get married by an Elvis impersonator in a rhinestone studded chapel.

And while this may be what eloping used to mean, the definition has changed a ton in recent years! Eloping isn’t what is used to be – and as more couples realize that their wedding day doesn’t have to fit the mold that the wedding industry has created, it’s time to redefine the word “elopement.” 

What is an Elopement?

What if, instead of letting other people tell you how your wedding “should be,” you could get married in a way that actually reflects who you are?

What if you could ditch expectations, pressures, and stress, and instead of throwing a party that you know your heart isn’t in, you could spend your day with the love of your life, taking in each amazing moment, and knowing that this is exactly where you’re meant to be?

That’s exactly what eloping is about! There’s no one way to elope, or one definition of what an elopement looks like, because the point is that your wedding day should be about you. It should be intentional, it should be meaningful, and it should be whatever you want it to be.

Eloping can include a mountain summit and an adrenaline-rushing adventure, or it can be an evening spent roasting s’mores – or both, neither, and everything in between! Eloping means having the wedding day that the two of you want, whatever that means for you.

Myths About Elopements – What an Elopement Isn’t

Because of the changing definition of eloping, there are still a ton of myths about what it means to elope! Let’s break them down, one at a time.

“Elopements Are Rushed”

A lot of people believe that elopements are for couples who don’t want to invest time into their wedding day, and that eloping is just a last minute, quick ceremony. In reality, many of my couples spend months planning and crafting their elopement day! Today, elopements aren’t about rushing to get legally married, they’re about being intentional and planning a day that’s focused on the couple.

The actual elopement day isn’t about rushing through a ceremony either – elopements can last all day, because it’s not a less meaningful version of a traditional wedding. Your elopement is still the day you get married, and that deserves to be honored – it’s not just a “quick ceremony,” it’s a day devoted to celebrating the beginning of your marriage.

“Elopements Are Shameful and Secretive”

“You Can’t Have Guests at an Elopement”

And speaking of guest lists, a lot of people believe that an elopement is always just the couple – no guests, no family, no friends. While this can definitely be the case, and some couples feel that a private experience shared between the two of them is  what they want, other couples can’t imagine their day without their loved ones!

You can definitely invite guests to your elopement. My husband and I had 12 guests when we eloped, and they added so much to the experience. If the people around you love you and support you, an elopement with guests feels just as meaningful and special!

“Elopements are Less Special or Less Important Than a Traditional Wedding”

This one breaks my heart – so many people believe that eloping isn’t as meaningful, as special, or as important as a traditional big wedding. But this is still the day you get married! It’s a big deal, and choosing to be intentional in how you do it, and planning a day that reflects the two of you and showcases your unique story matters. 

An elopement isn’t a lesser version of a wedding – it’s just as important, and deserves to be celebrated!

“Elopements Only Happen in Courthouses”

A lot of people think of elopements as quick ceremonies in a courthouse (or a Vegas chapel), where couples go to sign some papers and be done with it. But, an elopement can happen just about anywhere! This is one of my favorite things about elopements – you aren’t confined to traditional wedding venues, and you can get married in a park, on a hiking trail, in your backyard, in a foreign country… anywhere that you want as a backdrop when you tie the knot.

“Elopements Only Happen on Mountaintops”

On the flip side, as elopements become more popular in the last few years, some people believe that eloping requires you to climb a mountain or go on a strenuous hike to get married in a jaw dropping, scenic location. A lot of the elopement photos on Instagram showcase couples on mountain peaks – but eloping doesn’t mean you have to hike, or even break a sweat if that’s not what you want for your day.

Adventure isn’t about the sweat or the effort – it’s about the spirit of the day. It’s about experiencing something together, whether that’s a hike, a picnic, an evening of stargazing, a celebration with your loved ones, or anything else you can imagine. Your day can be anything you want it to be – and it doesn’t have to include anything that you don’t want!

I’ve photographed elopements that included less than 1.5 miles of hiking total, and even ones in Airbnbs or family homes that had zero hiking whatsoever! You can totally find scenic overlooks, easy to reach spots, and even ADA accessible elopement locations all over!

“Elopements Are *Cheap*”

The average wedding in the United States cost $28,000 in 2019. That’s a really hefty price tag!
While elopements typically cost less than the average wedding, this doesn’t mean elopements are for couples who are “cheap,” or who don’t want to invest in their wedding day. Eloping gives you more freedom in how you spend your money – and the value of an elopement doesn’t come from the dollar amount. Couples can decide what’s important to them and what they want to invest in for their day, and the elopement budget goes to experiences, as opposed to traditional weddings where there is a lot more money spent on things and material items. For some more info on how much elopements cost, check out this guide!

What is Elopement Photography?

Now that we’ve answered the question of what an elopement is, a lot of couples also wonder about elopement photography! It differs a ton from traditional wedding photography, and when you’re searching for the right person to document the day, I recommend looking for people who specialize in elopements.